Good afternoon and welcome to the Henley Woodland Burial Ground to celebrate the life of Michael Alfred Fisher, known to most as Freddie. 

I’d like to offer an especially warm welcome to Freddie’s loving family who meant the world to him; his son Guy and daughter-in-law Vanessa, here with grandchildren Wallace, Minnie and Zac.  Freddie was known to his children and grandchildren as “Do”, so called because he was always busy and always doing!

Not everyone who loves Freddie is able to join us today, but I know he will be in their thoughts, and our thoughts are with his daughter Victoria, son-in-law Matt and grandchildren Ludo and Coco.

A warm welcome also to Freddie’s sister Gill, to his brother and sister-in-law and great friends Nigel and Biddy, his Best Man Paul and, of course, his dog Daphne as well as to wider family and Freddie’s many friends, who have come here to celebrate his long and full life.

My name is Lynn, I’m a celebrant for Humanists UK and I’m honoured to lead Freddie’s ceremony in this beautiful woodland burial ground where a native woodland is being planted for future generations to enjoy, something Freddie approved of. 

As many of you know, Philippa’s grave is also here and Guy and Vanessa have marked it with some fresh flowers, so that those of you who wish to, can pause at the spot as you leave. 

When I discussed today with Guy, he assured me that Freddie “wouldn’t want us moping around”. 

A funeral is always a sad event, but it’s also an opportunity to reflect on a long and full life, to celebrate this kind and generous man who loved his family and valued his friends. 

Freddie leaves you all with your own memories of his great sense of humour, his appreciation of fine wine, good food, good company and strong views on many things! 

We are going to begin Freddie’s ceremony with a reminder of his story, written by Guy.  I am honoured to read this on his behalf:

Freddie’s Story

Michael Alfred Fisher - also known to friends as Freddie and ‘Do’ by his children and grandchildren, was born in January 1940 to Doris and Alfred Fisher in war-torn Acocks Green, Birmingham.  Little was shared of the early history, but it seems likely that the family home was bombed in the blitz, forcing a move to Kidderminster… a traumatic start for a young family. 

Brought up in Kidderminster with his younger sister, Gill, and an older couple known as Nan and George, Freddie was sent to a private school called Sebright, a 15-minute cycle ride away, which must have had a huge impact on his life. Described to Guy recently as quite an unhappy childhood, his sister, Gill recalls that there were also plenty of good times.

Guy remembers him talking fondly of school and how he enjoyed playing rugby, and his time in the CCF, where shooting the Sergeant Major with rabbit droppings seemed to have been a highlight!  Freddie recounted loving seeing the spitfires ‘hedgehopping’ as they flew near across the fields.  He continued to enjoy war movies and novels about WW2 as well as an interest in the Roman Empire throughout his life.

Freddie left school at 16 and started his working life sweeping the factory floors at the local carpet manufacturers, Brintons. The company owners saw something in him, and at 17, off he went to digs at Earls Court to start his sales career. 

With money in his pocket at a young age, and a sense of freedom, he would get to know London well, traveling by tube and foot, and no doubt enjoying the lifestyle.  Perhaps this is where his value of quality clothing and his appearance was formed. His regular customer visits to large high street department stores gave him the opportunity to buy a new item of clothing on every visit!  A habit of a lifetime!

Freddie loved and took huge pride working for the best carpet manufacture in the world at the time. He grew fond of the family members who owned and operated the business and made lifelong friends in the flooring world. Freddie became the area sales representative covering Wales, which involved moving out of London in his 20’s and driving a lot - something he loved.  It also allowed him to develop his excellent Welsh accent whilst he hung out in the Neath Country Club.

Freddie had a good network of Kidderminster friends as he grew up, and hung around with ‘Itchy Whims’, John Swindon, Gill's to-be husband Mick and Paul Hodge [Paul is with us today] often found in the Bryers Country club, the Dog at Harvington or round Paul’s parents farmhouse table playing cards late in to the night.  I’m told that the late-night club at the Chateau Impney was a regular den of iniquity!

 
He loved to drive and loved his cars, and unsurprisingly hated being driven, understandable because he was sent from the back seat through the windscreen of a car at the age of 21 whilst in Cornwall.  Lucky to survive, he was flown to Frenchay hospital in Bristol where he remained for months, having his skull opened up from ear-to-ear to remove glass from his brain. Gill and their mother are convinced that his personality changed as a result – a known side effect!

Not long after receiving his treasured 40 years’ service gold watch from Brintons, and ending up as Southern Area Manager based in Epsom, he was made redundant because the old fashioned company failed to keep up with the times - which must have been a huge blow for him.

He tried his hand for a few years in the family flooring business that Guy was now running but, sadly, this was not a marriage made in heaven and after a few years, and some difficult discussions, he graciously retired to get under Philippa’s feet!
When he was in his early 20’s, Mike Fisher, as he was known up to now, met 21-year-old Philippa Brough through mutual Midlands friends.  He was quickly welcomed into the fun and generous Brough family. Philippa decided that ‘Mike Fisher the carpet salesman’ needed re-branding and noting that his middle name was Alfred, re-named him Freddie as he was introduced to her world of horses, dogs, country pursuits and antiques.

Freddie and Philippa were married in 1969 in a joint wedding alongside Philippa’s brother Nigel and his wife Biddy - and they honeymooned together in Malta. The two couples formed a very close lifetime bond - enjoying fun times and holidays. Nigel and Biddy continued to lovingly support and visit Freddie regularly after Philippa’s death. Freddie also continued the close family bond with his niece, Henrietta who took time to visit, meet up and love him, as he did her.

The newlyweds, Freddie and Philippa moved to Gravel Hill in Henley to start their family with their black lab, Poppy.  In 1971, Victoria was born within a few days of her cousin Henrietta - the two girls becoming the best of friends. In 1973, Guy was born and, the family moved to Crocus Cottage in Shepherds Green, which was swiftly renamed ‘Bears’.  Freddie absolutely loved his house and the area where he lived and proclaimed that he would have to be taken from it feet first, which practically happened!

He loved the area, the countryside, Henley and the regatta, and many of the local eateries in the area. His favourite places were at home, being by the sea, driving across France and to the Alps, at the top of Duncary Beacon in Somerset, on the Thames in his boat, Crocodile.

Freddie became known as ‘Do’ at home - as he was always doing something. Saturdays were often spent with a visit to Henley to do the weekly Waitrose shop with Guy, visiting Barclays and getting donuts and french bread from the bakers whilst Philippa was busy with her horses with Victoria. He loved nothing more than wielding his chainsaw and axe whilst collecting firewood with his great friend ‘Ponny’ Butler or doing jobs in the garden with Philippa.
Philippa and Freddie were a very sociable couple with a large group of friends. Most weekends involved a good deal of fun with dinner parties or meals out at a local pub or a barbeque with plenty of alcohol flowing. He had a sharp wit and a great sense of an almost child-like humour.

Freddie enjoyed relaxing with a pint or two in the local pubs - and would often be found at the Lamb, the Dog and Duck or the Rising Sun on a Sunday afternoon with David Westcott and John Butler. He loved a meal out with Philippa and friends and in retirement a good mocha and cinnamon bun when out and about.

Annual family holidays were spent skiing in France with visits to Cornwall in the summer. Ironically, although he suffered from the cold in later years, he didn’t when he was younger… Always a cold shower, head first into icy seas and rarely a hat worn in the winter mountains resulting in frost-bitten ears on more than one occasion - but he would not be told!!

After retiring, he and Philippa were able to head off on more holidays with friends and they visited Australia, South Africa, New York, Croatia and Tuscany as well as enjoying regular ski trips to Switzerland and France - a country he really adored. 

Freddie valued education and made sure that his children attended good schools. He attended every rugby match that Guy played in - and was embarrassingly vocal and involved - and was asked to leave the touchline on more than one occasion!  His same veracity would be witnessed when watching England play rugby - where he would often best be left alone to swear and curse at the television. 

Soon, 5 grandchildren arrived and he loved them equally, taking interest in all of them and enjoying family holidays with Philippa with both Guy, Victoria and their young families in Cornwall for a few years.

Freddie was a conservative through and through, set in his ways and resistant to change - he liked things as he liked them.

The journey of life continued to present him with many challenges, all of which he faced head on.

He was not perfect! He was charming to those who shared his values and political leanings, but could rub people up the wrong way, intolerant of those who did not see eye to eye with him, especially when they were around HIS dining table. 

In his 70s, following dizzy spells and a fall down the stairs where he fractured his back, he was diagnosed with heart failure and opted for a heart operation which provided him with 10 more years.  This eventually caught up with him.  Life tested him further when a knock on the back window on March 18th four years ago from his friend and neighbour Sue Fulford-Dobson, revealed that Philippa had collapsed and would not survive.

Freddie faced up to life living alone with bravery and stoicism without losing his sense of humour. Under strict instructions from Guy, he continued to write birthday and Christmas cards to friends and family and did his best to see friends. He learned to fend for himself once again and re-united with his Best Man, Paul, they headed off for some fun on a few holidays together abroad and in the UK.

Guy regularly visited and called most days to check up on him and see if he was still alive!  He and Vanessa became his support system and counsellors, PA’s, hospital taxi service and regular visitors, enjoying meals and family time together.

More recently, he was able to pick things back up with Victoria, Ludo and Coco, taking an interest in their business and busy lives.  Whilst his health denied a visit to their second home Abu Dhabi, he managed a visit to their house last Boxing day.

He took delight in seeing his grandchildren - and he loved helping Wallace with his multiple mechanical projects and was able to hear that his house purchase completed the day before he died.

He delighted in hearing that his ‘party pooping’ granddaughter, Minnie was enjoying life and loved to hear about how his youngest, ‘Zacawaka’ was doing with school, tennis and his dancing. 

From the time he got married and as life became busier, it’s fair to say that Freddie was not the best at communicating with his mother, or his sister Gill and her family. Before Philippa, and Gill’s wonderful husband Mick died, the two couples became closer and more recently, Freddie and Gill shared some quality time together with common ground in their grieving and their shared memories of their upbringing.

Freddie continued to make good friends and charm people on his local travels and formed a close bond with new neighbour Ali and her daughter Petra, who helped walk his dog.  He loved hosting a Christmas gathering on the Green and continued to make it to the Henley Show for a picnic each year with Guy, Vanessa and the Penny’s and was proud to watch Wallace show his vintage tractor.

He was always excited at Christmas, like a child, and since Philippa died, Christmas Eve involved supper at the Bears with the Fisher Juniors and Penny Westcott ably standing in for Philippa with some great puddings and fun.

Last Christmas, in a rush of blood, he decided to push the boat out and have two Christmas trees for the first time, much to everyone’s amusement!

Freddie struggled with his health more over the last 18 months, and he formed an amazing bond with the medical team at Townlands Hospital. Guy would like to acknowledge the incredibly humbling love and care shown by the team of women over the last year or so and especially during his last few days. 

Almost like he knew his time left was short, his last few weeks were jam packed and involved some time with Nigel, Biddy and Henrietta, a barbeque with Wallace and his girlfriend, Ali, dog walk visits and diet cokes with Minnie, and a huge effort to drive up to the Midlands, determined to spend time with his sister Gill and see his best man Paul.

He will certainly be missed by those that love him but would want no sorrow as he certainly lived the full human experience he signed up for, which we can celebrate and be grateful for.

Tributes from Gill

Afterglow

by Helen Lowrie Marshall

I’d like the memory of me to be a happy one.
I’d like to leave an afterglow of smiles when life is done.
I’d like to leave an echo whispering softly down the ways,
Of happy times and laughing times and bright and sunny days.
I’d like the tears of those who grieve, to dry before the sun;
Of happy memories that I leave when life is done.

An Irish Blessing

May the road rise up to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sunshine warm upon your face,

And the rains fall soft upon your fields.

And until we meet again,

May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Pause for Reflection

We are going to pause to spend a minute in silent, private reflection. 

As we stand together in this quiet space, surrounded by trees, earth and sky, we pause to reflect on a life that has touched our own.

We take a few moments for you to remember Freddie in your own way, perhaps to recall a cherished memory, good times spent with him and moments shared.  To give thanks for his life.

May the peace of this place, the song of the birds, the strength of the trees and the beauty of the natural world surround us now as we remember, reflect and say farewell.

If you have faith, this is a time when you may choose to say a private prayer.

The Committal

The final part of Freddie’s ceremony is called the committal.

We know we are committing his body to be buried in the earth, but you are also committing him to your hearts and memories forever.

In nature, we are reminded that all things belong to a greater cycle, the leaves fall and nourish the ground and new growth emerges in its season.  So too, the love and kindness shared by Freddie will continue to live on in the memories of those who loved him.

I will now say a few words of thanks and then, whilst Freddie’s coffin is being lowered, his grandson Wallace will play a piece of music that Freddie would sing and dance to!

Here, in this last act, immune now to the changes and the chances of our human life, we commit the body of Michael ‘Freddie' Fisher to the earth which sustained and nourished him, and which regenerates all life. 

A much-loved son, brother, husband, father, grandfather and friend, he will be greatly missed but he will always be cherished in the hearts and memories of those who love him.

Now, with immense sorrow for his death but with enormous gratitude for his life, we leave him in peace and with our love, we bid him a final farewell with one of his favourite tracks!